Playing catch up

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Where do I begin to describe these past few weeks? Now that I have a moment to sit down and jot it all out, it doesn't come easily.

I suppose I should start with my first source of anxiety. A couple of months ago, my hubby's (bad) back started acting up again. Let me remind you that he had a spinal fusion in 2004, but has since recovered to almost full function. Until recently, that is. The pain started to return, as did the numbness and pain down one of his legs (oddly, the opposite leg as before). I'll skip all the boring details of us trying to reopen his old workers' comp case (which still hasn't happened) and our decision to go ahead and get testing and treatment moving without it, and jump right to the chase. He has herniated another disc. The one right above the old problem, of course. This was likely caused by the reduced flexibility in the area due to the fusion. Luckily, it does not appear to be bad enough yet to require surgery (not that it will ever fix itsself), but for now we are trying cortisone injections to try and control the pain. In the meantime, he has missed a ton of work. I mean a TON. I am scared to death that he'll lose this job. Everyone SEEMS very understanding, but you just never know. So, needless to say, I've been a little stressed. Between his dinky paychecks and his constant pain and his inability to help around the house to my constant state of worry about our future, I've been feeling a little lost.

On March 13, the whole back issue was shoved into perspective when life came crashing down around us. With no warning whatsoever, my hubby's mother, our baby's beloved Mawmaw, passed away, leaving us all in complete shock for several days. It has been hard, to say the least. Our big girl was particularly close to Mawmaw, and she has been struggling right along with the rest of us. We let her go to the funeral. We let her write a letter to Mawmaw and place it in the casket. We've talked to her about speaking to Mawmaw in her mind & she's talked to the school counselor as well. She seems to be doing okay now, but she has her moments, out of the blue, where she suddenly feels the stab of missing her again. As do we all.
On the very day that Mawmaw went to heaven, we were suppose to have our Bug's fourth birthday party. She simply doesn't understand the situation, and was very disappointed when we canceled the party, so we ended up going ahead with it the next day. Tinkerbell was this year's theme, and our girl was ready, dressed for the part of course!

It was hard to put on our party faces that day, but we are so glad that we did. This little girl's birth is surely something to celebrate!

That very week, Hubby and I also celebrated our 10 year wedding anniversary. Wow. TEN years! A whole stinkin' decade. That's unbelievable. That weekend, I took him on a "surprise" trip to the city, complete with a hockey game and walk to the art museum, dinner and a movie out and lots of time to ourselves. It feels a little odd to be able to sleep til 10am (haven't done that in over 7 years!), get ready in the morning without someone trying to climb my leg, or just relax for a bit without a dozen interruptions. Ahhh, I almost want to go back! Here are a few glimpses from our weekend...
Turns out nosebleed seats are a good thing at a hockey game!




There was a beautiful Chihuly glass exhibit at the museum, along with it's other regular beauties!



It was just what we both needed, that's for sure. Too bad we had to come back to the reality (and anxiety) of it all so soon.


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